Fan-Ball Wiki

Memories of Fan-Ball/HankGuideDude

< Memories of Fan-Ball

1,312pages on
this wiki
Add New Page
Comments11 Share

The Arrival

My life as a grub

On the 23rd bilunar perigee of the 6th bright season's equinox, I was born as a grub, like the rest of Trollkind. However, I used to be different then the rest of the Highbloods of my caste, which means I had little to no interest in clowns, felt rare miraculousness, uninterested of consuming sopor slime and had some keen interest in Gambling, especially throwing dice. My former lusus, weirdly enough, was a walking-flying-swimming Mer-Treant-thing that frightened me when I was just a grub. My name has went by "Hankvi Guidza" by my lusus.

Early preparations

When I grew up as a troll, I have gained some confidence, even though I had little courage and wisdom to carry around. My lusus wasn't as terrible as I thought it would be, as it had many words and advices, which I rather ignored at some points. I practiced to become an adventurer, and not a Subjugglator. For this, I had many assignments, which were assigned by my lusus, such as skill practicing, belief in miracles, and, to an extent, strife enemies. For that, my lusus made a hatchet purely out of reinforced Mithril into my "hatchetkind" Strife Specibi.

The weird "arm"

When I was about 6 solar sweeps old, I had the proper capabilities to be an adventurer. I waved my lusus goodbye, and head to the woods to begin my adventure. Deep in the thick, thick forest, I took note of an abandoned, mossy, purple tower, with a weird symbol that looked like my shirt's symbol.
A miracle? I thought not. So I tried to enter the tower, but there was no door or window. As an act of desperation, I delivered a punch to the tower. Upon punching it, a faint blue glow was created on the wall, and then there was a clear "black hole". I was frightened about this phenomena, but due to my curiosity, I peeked into the opening of the "hole". On the other end, I saw a dark room with a chest that is covered in moss. I jumped through the "portal" I just made, and opened the chest with little to no effort using my hatchet. Inside, there was an incredibly unstable axe which was made of a mixture of Light and Darkness, along with a journal about "Pensiver Axeswish", which was opened on page 623. And I read it:
~ []n the [::]th bilunar perigee []f the red seas[]n's e[,]uin[]x ~
I have finally left these Subjugglat[]rs []ff my trail. I pr[]bably sh[]uld have
not trait[]red the highbl[][]ds and t[] establish empathetic th[]ughts t[] The
Penssh[]t and The Sresr[]tt, kn[]wing full and well that w[]uld cause an
armagedd[]n full of cha[]s. I have arrived t[] a dead-end, and, as a s[]rt []f a
miracle fr[]m the fake messiahs, I punched the gr[]und []ut []f desperati[]n and
there it was, a faint blue gl[]w and a black h[]le in the gr[]und, s[] I have
made an escape r[]ute using the s[]-called "Karma Arm" all the way t[] the []ther
side []f Alternia, where the sunset began. F[]r the minute, I th[]ught I was
safe, but the pumpkin right beside me was

And then the rest of the pages were mysteriously torn.... except for a clue of some sorts when I skipped to the end:

I pr[]bably w[]n't make it, s[] wh[]ever takes this j[]urnal, please take the Axe
[]f Cha[]s. May it serve y[]u well. And here is als[] a clue t[] y[]ur destiny:
Dan-Ball. The rest is up t[] y[]u....

I had no idea what it meant, so as soon as I gathered all of the continents from the chest. I returned to the portal and went back besides the tower.

Inevitable escape?

As soon as I started to walk back to my hive, I got interrupted by a hostile Hoofbeast. I quickly assigned the new-found "Axe of Chaos" into my strife deck in "axekind", and put the "hatchetkind" card into my Strife Porfolio. As I swung my axe towards the Hoofbeast, it emitted a lot of light and darkness and completely annihilated it, but the axe also somehow made the sun to rise up faster and I started to feel burns. I ran as fast as possible to my hive, but unfortunately, I stumbled and fell down on the ground, created another portal and fell through it. I remember I fell for about half an hour, but I soon got out of the other end of the portal, everything was different and dormant and dubious. The portal disappeared for no reason. This is when I knew my fountain of miracles ran out, even though I had no belief in the fake messiahs....

Isolation.... or is it?

As I explored the surroundings, it looked more.... pixely and simple. I was turned into a Stick Figure and my head was turned into a square head, but my horns retained. That.... was.... a.... MIRACLE!!!! I started to grow fondness to the new "universe" already. Until.... I've met up with 4 stickmen which looked a lot like me, but with white bodies and tan square heads. They all wielded weapons which were a Bow, an Orb of some sorts, a pair of Gloves, and a Whip. I feared they would aggrieve me, but instead, they did nothing. They just stood there, doing nothing. I tried to wave at them hello, but one stickman sort of got "Manipul8ed" and swung in mid-air, as if there was some kind of "invisible arm". As soon as I dropped my arm down, the stickman fell down as well. With no words, no pain, and no response from the stickmen, I suddenly did not understand anything. I did, however, noticed a sign, with the word "NEXT" carved on it. I approached the sign, but nothing happened, as there was some sort of a "barrier", so I tried to "Manipul8" the other stickman to the sign and soon everything went black. I then saw the map of the "Universe", which was rather little, and pinpointed me to the "Opening Street", where the stickmen just walked to those weird hostile creatures, and killed them whilst being attacked. Now I know the "Game" session I was "playing" would be dangerous, perhaps even more dangerous than some of the games, like "Sgrub", "Fiduspawn" and even "Flarp"....

Trial and Error by the darkness

After a while, I have kept my composure, and we went through the Grasslands, the Forests, and finally, the Caverns, all by the stickmen, since I was unable to join the strife-fest due to no access to the Strife Portfolio. That being in mind, the most fearsome beings were the huge red stickmen at the end of the caverns. The stickmen charged forward, whilst avoiding the flames they breathed. However, nearly every stickman died. I started to lose hope, so I have retreated back to Town, revived the unconscious corpses and healed them at the Inn. Strangely, my Strife Deck was inaccessible, but my Fetch Modus (in this case: Die modus) was accessible, so I got my "Jewtop" out and started to search for help. To my surprise, there was signal and found the answer: The "Dan-Ball Wiki". Once I have gathered enough info, I have thought up a strategy that would consider us "Victorious". After we returned to the end of the caverns, stronger then they were, they fought the Fire-breathing Skullheads again and we won. Much to the dismay, all there was is just a village, with pointless low-leveled Compo Items. So we continued to explore more areas, including the Castle, the Shrine, and even the unknown territory (stage ???). Thanks to the Wiki, I have now learned the secrets of "Stick Ranger". Thus, I signed up as "HankGuideDude", supported by posting new discoveries, and witnessed once every few weeks as the universe keeps changing with new additions. It was so beautiful. Life is beautiful. Until....

Spark in imagination

....until my think pan thought up of something.... unreal. I wasn't even trying to be bored staying in the SR universe for what? Several months? But I had some ideas which they would be amazing if they were to be added to the SR universe. Thus, I have posted the "Moon Series" with my spare time. At first, there was no reaction before, but it did attracted some visitors, but the most devoted of the bunch were: A Serrangio named "Ludicrine", a Yoshi called "ZoshiX", and a Dark Matter known as "DMSwordsmaster". Soon the entire DB Wiki organization went abrupt, as fictional Weapons, Compo Items, Classes and even ideas for other "games", such as Powder Game and Elemental Box expanded in a frightening rate. Something had to be done to separate the fiction from the reality.... and to somehow bring the fiction into life. So the aforementioned Yoshi created a parallel universe that looked very similar to the SR universe, but with the "Fan-Ball Wiki" taking control of literally everything. And now, here I am, a resident of the Wiki, manager of the Adoption Center, Breeding Center and the many, many divisions under the care of the "LDZX Corporations", and the keeper of the NEW hive I rebuilt along with several adopted pets with various stats assigned.


Extra: Pensiver's Journal

Page 2

~ On the 9th bilunar perigee of the 3rd dim season's equinox ~
I woke up from my recuperacoon for a simple glass of Faygo, being careful not to
get too sugar rushed or dehydrated. I then took notice of my nightstand and on it
were a note and a weird green captchalogue card. I read the note:
"IF Y[]U ARE READING THIS, THEN I HAVE FORG[]TTEN Y[]UR [:::]TH WRIGGLING DAY. BUT T[]DAY Y[]U ARE FIT F[]R BEING AN ADVENTURER. D[] N[]T FORGET T[] WEAP[]NIZE Y[]URSELF. HERE. HAVE AN H[]N[]RARY PLACR[]NYM AS WELL. D[] MAKE ME PR[]UD." The honorary placronym has named me Murtaw Guidza. A spine-chilling name, but
"honorable". Speaking of being fit to be an adventurer, I did learn the basic
skills for survival over the past few days, but never have I used a weapon before.
My lusus was a well-known weapon-crafter (or crafts-lusus?), crafting weapons out
of the rarest metals known to trollkind. However, outside waited for me
thornbushes that surrounded my towering hive, and were incredibly thick. I
noticed a spare chainsaw lying around and had to input that in the strife deck as
chainsawkind and proceeded to trim the hedges. And so begins my adventure with my
first journal entry!

Page 23

~ []n the 66th bilunar perigee []f the [.]st bright seas[]n's e[,]uin[]x ~
During s[]me s[]rt []f a trip al[]ng the waterfall, I fell d[]wn and br[]ke my
left arm []ff between the r[]cks. It hurt s[] bad that I felt s[]mething strange
[]ther than the n[]rmal received sh[]ck. I n[]ticed I c[]uld "draw" p[]rtals and
"tearing" space apart. F[]rtunately there was a seadwelling d[]ct[]r (which
specialized in seaweed f[]r all tr[]llkind cares)
that was able t[] amputate my
arm []ff and give me a cybernetic []ne, but there was purple bl[][]d everywhere;
even []n my sleeve, that it made him panic silently. But apart fr[]m that, I
wasn't able t[] get ar[]und that because all []f that trauma caused me t[] "snap"
and "tear" at the seadweller int[] its c[]llapsing and expanding bladder based
a[,]uatic vascular system, and gibbed it after thr[]wing its b[]dy acr[]ss the
r[][]m in cyan flames.

I was deathly afraid that they w[]uld find ab[]ut what happened, s[] I had t[]
"draw" a p[]rtal that leaded me instantly where I started: My t[]wer. There, my
lusus f[]r n[] reas[]n went berserk and started t[] put me d[]wn. With the
failure []f neg[]ciating it, I killed it in the pr[]cess []f a mental breakd[]wn.
As I stared []nt[] my bl[][]dy sleeve, I realized that I have a third arm that
represents its curse and sw[]rn t[] pr[]tect with it, even if my sanity descends
int[] the v[]id. I then began practicing my arm t[] bec[]me a f[]rgiven knight.

Page 236

~ []n the 13th bilunar perigee []f the [::.]th dark seas[]n's e[,]uin[]x ~
As I c[]ntinued t[] age and study the invisible arm ([]r as I called it the "Karma
Arm"), I learned that with it I am able t[] travel between dimensi[]ns with[]ut
any flaws that I c[]uld see. I had a crazy experience while I tried t[] get []ut
[]f what the makeshift p[]rtal I built back at the lighth[]use sent me int[]. It
sent me t[] a place where there was n[] space, time, beginning, n[]r end.
F[]rtunately, I tried using my arm t[] escape, but there fl[]ated a "deity",
which intr[]duced itself as "Cha[]s". I learned t[] drain its energy, thus
breaking myself free fr[]m "The L[][]p".

The energy I c[]llected seemed t[] be s[] cha[]tic that I had t[] separate the
light and the dark and "l[]ck" their states s[] it remained p[]werful f[]r l[]ng.
I decided t[] craft f[]r myself an axe and thus created a weap[]n that w[]uldn't
risk my inner cha[]s t[] p[]inlessly destr[]y the space-time c[]ntinuum.

N[]w, I must pursue these damned tr[]lls f[]r alm[]st trying t[] kill me with
taph[]ph[]bia back at the lighth[]use. Perhaps if I expl[]red the "F[]rbidden
Territ[]ry", I might track them d[]wn. And I'll keep my smile []n t[] press me
f[]rward.... :)

Page 623

Ad blocker interference detected!

Wikia is a free-to-use site that makes money from advertising. We have a modified experience for viewers using ad blockers

Wikia is not accessible if you’ve made further modifications. Remove the custom ad blocker rule(s) and the page will load as expected.